I am African. Our stories are alive, etched on our skin, and resonate through our daily rhythms. We tell them freely; they are not just written down. Trying to put this vibrant life into written words can seem strange, almost like betraying the story. At the same time, I have spent many years in America, a country rich in written stories, records, and documents that have shaped destinies and inspired new interpretations and policies.
I feel caught between two cultures: Africa and America. I lived in Africa for 25 years during my childhood and have been in America for 28 years as an adult. Who am I? Where is my true home? I identify with both worlds yet feel fully connected to neither. Coming from an oral tradition in my childhood, I have developed within a written landscape as an adult. In this book narrative, I will seek to balance both of these dimensions of my life.
This is a memoir, an unveiling of the contours of my life that have shaped who I am today. In it I reflect on how experiences have shaped me into the imperfect person I am today-husband, father, leader, and more importantly, a disciple of Jesus, formed by cultures that both clash and blend.
I reflect here on key memories, pivotal events, defining practices, thoughts, locations, people, words, and emotions that both helped to form who I am now, but also continue to shape me. Reality, after all, is not a fixed point; it is in constant flux; being continually reshaped. I exist within a web of relationships that stretches across the globe, both as a part of the web and forever distinct from it.
My experiences-growing up in an African village, attending a boys' boarding high school, exploring the busy Nairobi slums, completing a short-term missions project in Musoma near Lake Victoria in Tanzania, and living in Maryland, Virginia, and Pennsylvania in the U.S., as well as working in other countries-have profoundly influenced my personal development. Additionally, my journey through marriage, parenthood, ministry, leadership, and coaching has significantly deepened how I interact with the world.
I understand my story, while unique and undeniably mine, is in many respects, like yours. We're all human beings shaped by stories. Influences from God, family, churches, communities, schools, organizations, and the broader world have all played crucial roles in forming who I am, and in forming who you are. These impacts are significant. While this book will highlight key aspects of my upbringing, it won't cover every detail of my life. While determining which parts of my experiences best explain who I am has been challenging, I have chosen to share what I remember as the most significant relationships and pivotal events.
I have chosen to write this memoir because many people have encouraged me to reflect on what has shaped who I have become, and to describe my experiences and their impact in my own words. As my journey unfolded, I was fortunate to take on roles that allowed me to lead and mentor others in leadership. I understood that authentic leadership is not about holding power over others but about serving a purpose, helping individuals discover their strengths, and fostering a vibrant community. I also realized that I could blend the rich wisdom of my African heritage with the new life experiences I have had around the world.
